Oh Unemployment, how you toy with my heart, you!

Unemployment has been a friend of mine for only a month now and already we have had an emotional time together. He has opened my heart to dreams and disappointment. This time has been an exercise in resilience. Quick! Get up! That (other) dream job is slipping away. Some days are filled with high expectations and heart-pounding nervousness, first-date-worthy nervousness. Others are idle. I sit; I wander; stare at flowers and glance at my empty inbox. After stillness comes time to accept that I need to find other people, make better matches, and clarify my availability.

Sometimes, I am given reason to find myself saying, “Yes, I am available to move to New Orleans. ASAP? Why yes, of course!” I imagine packing my (at the moment, nonexistent) car with a bike, a suitcase of books, clothing, and a soul album or two. I’d decisively slam the trunk, tearfully meander through Oakland one last time and commit myself—like any strong-headed woman would—to a new life, heading out on my first solo road trip.

Most of all, my friend Unemployment has given me plenty of time to sit in front of postcards of Hugo Chavez and replicas of Vietnamese water buffaloes, dusty gifts from years past. Time to think about how there is no time to turn down jobs, only pressure to move forward. What right does this poor woman of color have to pass on opportunities? Who do you think you are, to deserve security, to live with dignity and sanity? Are you really asking to be paid for creativity and thoughtfulness? But the strength of this friend has taught me that there are worse things in life. I would rather keep my soul than expect less. I'm grateful for our time together.

Like some friends, though, I know Unemployment will soon slink into the background of my life. At times, he’ll say hi just to remind me of our possibilities together. Other times, I’ll even choose to be with him because the alternative will be too painful.

Baldwin's the Cross of Redemption

Gotta cop this book soon and start finding that Baldwin-esque voice.

Ill-literacy member, Adriel Luis on Baldwin's legacy.

Life goals as of now

Inspired by a certain Viet lady.

Note the overuse of the word "develop." Also, nothing about marriage or children. kthx!